About a Kid
There is unrest in the forest,
There is trouble with the trees,
For the maples want more sunlight
And the oaks ignore their pleas.
The trouble with the maples,
(And they're quite convinced the're right)
They say the oaks are just too lofty
And they grab up all the light.
But the oaks can't help their feelings
If they like the way they're made.
And they wonder why the maples
Can't be happy in their shade.
So the maples formed a union
And demanded equal rights.
"These oaks are just too greedy;
We will make them give us light."
Now there's no more oak oppression,
For they passed a noble law,
And the trees are all kept equal
By hatchet, axe, and saw.
God-Shaped Hole
[Billy:] "No, Jim you schmuck, the Valleys, Wales;
Male voice choirs" [Jim:] "Wales! Now is this sperm or blue-tip?"
[Billy:] "Ha, ha, ha, ha. Very funny Jim."
[Jim:] "Sorry."
[Billy:] "Me and Benny went out."
[Jim:] "Who's Benny?"
Me and Benny went out last night
Looking for fun
Supping ale in the moonlight
Waiting for the dawn to come
Benny pointed at a HiFi shop
He said, hey man, look at all the stuff they've got
How'd you make a have out of a have no